By Helen Lester

Parts (12): Narrator 1     Narrator 2     Narrator 3     Narrator 4     Narrator 5     Narrator 6
            Murdley        Bird           Aardvark       Pygmy          Hippo          Rabbit 


Narrator 1:   IT WASN'T MY FAULT

Narrator 2:   Things did not always go well for Murdley Gurdson.
Narrator 3:   He couldn't control the toothpaste.  He fell into wastebaskets.
Narrator 4:   And he dropped only valuable vases.  Whatever happened, it was usually his fault.
Narrator 5:   One day he went for a walk in his one too big new shoe.  
Narrator 6:   He had stepped out of the other one. He couldn't remember where.
Narrator 1:   Before long someone laid an egg on Murdley Gurdsonšs head.  He looked at a nearby
Murdley:     "Did you lay an egg on my head?"
Narrator 2:   he asked.  The bird confessed,
Bird:        "I did, but it wasn't my fault.  A horrible aardvark screamed and scared me."
Narrator 3:   So Murdley Gurdson and the bird went to see the aardvark.
Murdley:     "Did you scream and scare the bird into laying an egg on Murdley Gurdson's head?"
Narrator 4:   they asked.  The aardvark confessed,
Aardvark:    "I did, but it wasn't my fault.  A nasty, pygmy hippo stepped on my tail and a scream
              just popped out."
Narrator 5:   Together they went to find the pygmy hippo.  
Bird:        "Did you step on the aardvark's tail, making him scream and scare the bird into 
              laying an egg on Murdley Gurdson's head?"
Narrator 6:   they asked.  The pygmy hippo confessed,
Pygmy Hippo: "I did, but it wasn't my fault.  I did it by accident when I was getting out of the
              way of a hopping shoe with long ears."
Aardvark:    "A WHAT!"
Narrator 1:   they all asked.  Just then along came a hopping shoe with long ears.
Narrator 2:   With a pull and a tug, they soon found that the ears were attached to a rabbit. 
              The rabbit explained,
Rabbit:      "It wasn't my fault. I was hopping along when I landed in that shoe and became 
Narrator 3:   The shoe looked very much like the new too big shoe Murdley had stepped out of
              some time ago.  In fact, it was.  Murdley thought: 
Murdley:     "The rabbit became stuck in my shoe and frightened the pygmy hippo who stepped on 
              the aardvark's tail.  The aardvark screamed and scared the bird into laying an egg 
              on my head.  Then I suppose it way my fault," 
Narrator 4:   Murdley Gurdson said very sadly. Two tears splashed on his new too big shoes.
Pygmy Hippo: "There, there,"
Narrator 5:   said the pygmy hippo, the rabbit, the bird, and the aardvark,
Aardvark:    "Don't cry.  It was my fault."
Narrator 6:   said the aardvark.
Bird:        "It was my fault,"
Narrator 6:   said the bird.
Pygmy Hippo: "It was my fault,"
Narrator 1:   said the pygmy hippo.  
Rabbit:      "I think it was the shoe.  Let's go back to your house and do something about that
Narrator 1:   said the rabbit. They all went into the kitchen.  
Narrator 2:   The aardvark turned Murdley Gurdson upside down and the egg plopped into the pan.
              The rabbit ground the pepper.
Narrator 3:   The pygmy hippo added a pinch of salt. The bird ran around and around in the pan
              doing a very fine job of scrambling.
Narrator 4:   Murdley Gurdson enjoyed every bite of his scrambled egg. 
Narrator 5:   Murdley thanked his friends. He went to the door to let them out andŠ..
Narrator 6: wasn't his fault... when he accidentally opened the closet door instead of
              the front door and things came crashing down on his head!! 
Scripted by Jill Jauquet